How To Gracefully Say No (Without Feeling Guilty)

As spiritual entrepreneurs, our mission is to be of service to others through our unique brand of transformation. Seems simple, right? Yes… until you look at the experience of many spiritual solopreneurs: overwork for too little money, giving oodles away time for free, saying “yes” at the drop of a hat and putting everyone else’s needs before their own.

The intention is pure of heart and spirit. But all these forms of self-sabotage block your message, leave you feeling resentful and keep you from truly making the kind of impact you’re here to make.

The problem it’s simply that most of us were never taught to do the ONE thing that will empower us to take back our time and our energy, more than any other: set clear boundaries without feeling guilty.

If you’re frustrated because you know you’re “giving it all away” but don’t know how to break the cycle of saying yes when you really want to say no, here’s how to use your Divine Feminine Gift of Boundaries to empower yourself AND those you help.

Tip #1: Get fully on board with gracefully setting boundaries.

After working with hundreds of spiritual entrepreneurs, it’s been my experience that one reason why they give away so much is because they truly don’t understand how much it costs them to do so. They get pulled into the old patterns of “I should do XYZ” because everyone else is doing it, “it’s the spiritual thing to do,” or whatever.

It’s time to get REALLY clear, here: the shadow belief lurking behind boundaries violations is this: “The other person getting what THEY want is more important than I am.”

(If you’re as horrified at that as I was when I first read it, you’re not alone! I can say that this ONE awareness has probably kicked more “client butt” in my practice – in a very empowering way! – than any other.)

The key to gracefully setting boundaries without guilt is to adopt 2 new breakthrough beliefs:

What serves me, serves others.

People find a way to get what they need. (more on that in a second.)

Tip #2: The less said, the better.

When women say no, we instinctively want to jump in, justify, and explain. We want to make it okay for people. While these instincts come from a well-intentioned place, the subsequent behavior just opens the door for “negotiation”… which can lead to caving in.

The urge to make everyone feel better is simply conditioning. It’s a pattern. You can make a new choice at any time by simply saying, “I’m sorry, I’m unable to do that.” And leaving it at that.

Tip #3: Hold your clients (and yourself, AND everyone else) firmly in their power

One of my clients is in the process of “upleveling” – moving away from clients who she loves but can no longer serve in the same way because it asks too much of her. She’s struggling with guilt because she doesn’t want to leave anyone behind.

Here’s what I shared with her: people find a way to get what they need. (I recently learned that we humans are actually hardwired for this – kinda wild, right?) That means YOU don’t have to give yourself away – your clients (and everyone else) can take care of themselves.

I firmly believe that one of the keys to creating massive transformation is to hold them as powerful, always, no matter what. When you hold people as powerful, you create the space for them to step out of needy mode. And you empower yourself to release feelings of guilt as you make the choices that support you.

“Boundary Leaks” Are A Gift In Your Business

Here’s my invitation to you…

Next time you know you’ll have a situation where you’ll be tested on your boundaries (saying no to a client, standing firm in your pricing, sticking to an established agreement)… instead of dreading the conversation, look at it as an opportunity to stand firmly in your power. AND to hold your clients in theirs, too.

It may feel a little funny at first, but the more you set boundaries (and realize that the world isn’t going to collapse!)… the stronger you’ll get. You’ll feel soooo good when you direct your energy in ways that serve you first – so you can serve many, many more people through your Heart Work than you ever could before.

7 Essential Business Systems To Make 6-Figures Without Burning Out

Running your own business involves a zillion details and moving parts.  If you’re relying on yourself to remember all of these, you WILL get burned out.  Things WILL fall through the cracks.   Make no mistake: you need systems.

A system is simply a series of steps for a particular task or project.   The cool part?  You shouldn’t be the one executing the system.  Once you have systems documented, you can hand them off to key team members – this is how you begin to create a business that runs without you.

The first step to getting your systems house in order is creating an operations manual. This can be a simple Word document (shared online in a program like Google Docs) or I like to use Basecamp (from 37signals.com).  Your manual is a collection of systems, or lists that detail the key steps involved in running and growing your business.

If you’ve never systematized anything in your business before, take heart – if you take the same steps to achieve particular tasks in your business more than once, you already have the makings of a system for that task.  The key is to hone, refine and ultimately delegate the RIGHT systems that are going to grow your business.

Which systems should you implement FIRST?  Below are my top 7 systems that I used to create over $500k in revenue in just two years:

1. A system to attract new clients.

Your business growth depends on your ability to attract new, highly qualified, highly awesome ideal peeps into your world, month in and month out.  (The easiest way to get started?  A signature system, a signature talk, and local speaking gigs.  Simple, streamlined and proven.)

2. A system to turn interested clients into invested clients.

Pop quiz: what happens when a potential new client contacts you or your team out of the blue?   When you invest time, energy and attention to attract new clients, it only makes sense to have a system that kicks in to turn these interested potential clients into invested new clients.

3. A system to follow up with potential clients (after events, networking, or in-person meetings).

Nothing closes the “know-like-trust” gap faster than face-to-face connection, which means that every event you attend can mean thousands of dollars in business for you – if you follow up.  Next time you find a stack of business cards in your purse, ask yourself, “How can I systematize follow-up within 48 hours of the event?”  (Hint: get your assistant involved! )

4. A system for “keep in touch” follow-up (such as a newsletter).

There is no way that you can expect to fill your programs easily if you’re not doing SOME kind of follow-up.   Period.   (I don’t make the rules, Goddess, I just profit from them. )

Whether it’s a newsletter, a video newsletter, an evergreen autoresponder, or a blog (used in conjunction with email), you’ve got to do something and do it consistently.  Which means… you need a system.

5. A system to welcome new clients.

When a new client signs up, there’s excitement… and terror.  She’s thinking a zillion things, not the least of which is, “Did I really make the right move, giving $5000 to this person?”  And, “I just gave $5000 to this person… what happens now?”  Systematize the love to reassure them, get them in motion (to create results faster) and minimize the chances of them backing out of their commitment to themselves.

6. A system to serve clients in your programs.

Every program you offer needs to have a system behind it for scheduling the calls, delivering the calls, recording calls, distributing the calls, communicating with your peeps and whatever else you do to deliver the goods.  Your clients DO notice these details, which, when done well, leads to better results and repeat business.

7. A system to manage your cash.

Your cash flow system should include “buckets” for incoming money (X for taxes, Y for expenses, Z for your salary, and so on).  And always pay yourself, even if it’s just one dollar – the action matters more than the amount when you’re just getting started.

3 More Systems To Automate Your Business Growth:

8. A system to fill your programs.

Whether you’re just getting started or an empire builder in the making, your revenue comes from filling your programs – i.e., launching.  Without launching, your income will dwindle.  Without systems, launches can quickly take over your life.

9. A system to generate referrals.

The best clients come from your awesome current clients.  Awesome current clients love to refer, so make it easy on them.  (Which makes your business growth easy on you – win!)

10. A system to host teleseminars with partners.

This one’s a little more advanced, but it can’t be beat for building your list, creating great relationships, and signing on clients.  Once you have a signature talk, you can turn it into a teleseminar that you host for your partners’ communities.  Follow-up and sales are easy to automate with a shopping cart or email management software like Aweber.

Are you working too hard in your spiritual business?  Do you know you’re missing out on clients, losing opportunities to serve and bleeding income because you don’t have your systems in place? Get ready to get excited because my signature 6-figure training for spirit-driven entrepreneurs, Goddess Business School, returns in January 2012!  I’ve got lots of high-value no-cost goodies planned for you as we get closer to registration this fall.  Want to be put on the priority notification list for when we open?  Email Client Care Goddess Gretchen at teamgoddess@marketinggoddess.com with “Goddess Business School priority list” in the subject line.

Divine Feminine Entrepreneur Spotlight: Barb Wade

“I now have an amazing multi-six-figure practice!”

Barb Wade
BarbWade.com

“Before working with Elizabeth, I had been making the switch from a successful life coaching practice into a new niche of teaching other coaches how to create their own 6-figure practices. I had a few Platinum clients in the new niche, but the majority of my practice was still the traditional 1-on-1, dollars-for-hours model.

I was working too hard, burnt out… and truthfully, I was frustrated. While I wanted to transition those clients to Platinum packages, I was hesitant at the possibility of losing them because I was counting on that income!

Elizabeth helped me work out a strategy to value my time and quickly shift my business in a way that served both me AND my longtime clients. Within just a couple of weeks of our first retreat, I’d switched to an all-Platinum model, “upgraded” the appropriate clients, released the clients who were ready to complete and freed up ENTIRE DAYS in my schedule. (This had been totally unheard of!)

Then, we began designing at my ultimate “ideal” practice, which included more leveraging of my time and being able to impact more people. Elizabeth immediately saw how this could play out based on my unique strengths and expertise – she knew how I could position myself and stand out in the market. We crafted a detailed business plan built upon this, and I’m honored to say that the most recent course I facilitated had 27 new clients!

I’m now launching a unique, one-year group program which has been a true dream of mine. I’ve never felt more motivated and inspired in my 11 years as a coach! And it doesn’t hurt that now have a thriving, multi-six-figure practice!

Elizabeth is brilliant at not only crafting the “big picture vision,” but also at drilling down to the step-by-step strategies required to actually get there! Her direction is always “right on the money,” that’s for sure. I admire how she’s always taking that next step herself – moving into innovative new business models and endeavors – as she holds nothing back in teaching me every nuance and strategy involved.

Lastly, in addition to all of the wonderful business training and mentorship, Elizabeth has been truly committed to my playing a powerful “inside game.” She holds me accountable to believing in myself and my vision at a level I’d never reached before – which I know has instrumentally impacted my outcomes. Honestly, Elizabeth’s generosity, insight, extensive marketing expertise, and heartfelt commitment to her clients put her in a class by herself.

A Simple Formula To Set Your Fees (And Make Sure You Don’t Undercharge)

If so, you’re not alone. Your school or training program probably didn’t teach you how to set your fees, so what are you left to do? Look around at what everyone else is charging and follow suit.

Problem is, when everyone around you is stuck in dollars-for-hours mode (we’re all conditioned to think this way) and undercharging, it’s all too easy to form a belief that you can’t charge what you’re really worth or really want.

Remember, in your business, you’re the boss. You get to design your business to support the life you desire.  And it all starts with how you set your fees.

You might be thinking, “That’s great Elizabeth, but how can I charge what I really want?  Nobody would pay me!”  Goddess, that’s the wrong question!  Instead, ask yourself,

“Who would I have to BE in order to charge that amount, and attract the clients who will pay?”

Here’s a simple 7-step formula to set your fees from this new, empowered place:

Step 1.  Decide on your number.

How much do you need to make each month to live the life you want?  Be sure to include everything: all of your annual expenses, specific purchases you want to make, insurance payments, taxes – everything.

Big Hint: One of the big reasons why entrepreneurs fail when it comes to manifesting mo’ney is that they shoot too high, too soon.  If you’re barely paying your bills right now, focus on creating enough to cover your basic expenses.  Once you create that success, you can quickly move on to the next.

Step 2.  Decide what the money is FOR.

Money is neutral; it has no meaning in and of itself.  What gives it meaning is your emotion.  When your number actually means something to you, you’re much more motivated to put in the energy required to create it (including asking for what you want).

Step 3.  Decide how many hours you want to work.

All actions in your business have a cost, especially serving clients. You can’t create the income you want and the lifestyle you want without getting clear on exactly what you’re willing to pay in time.

Step 4.  Determine the number of clients you want to serve.

The number of private clients you take on is determined by the total number of hours you want to work divided by the time it takes to serve them.  Take care to NOT over-extend yourself – you need time to work ON your business, too!

Step 5.  Design your program or package.

Remember, clients invest in outcomes and results, not time.  What will your client get from working with you?  Your offer needs to have ONE clear core outcome that speaks to your clients’ immediate needs, plus you need to determine the value of that result to the client.

To save time (and in the future, leverage your time) and help your clients get even better results, organize your process into a series of steps, or unique system, that you can walk your clients through.  To further increase the value to your client, kick off your program or package with an intensive-style experience (like a VIP day) that helps them create a result quickly.

Step 6.  Determine the value.

Ask yourself, “When they have [X] result, what’s that worth to them?”  Be sure to look at the impact of the result on their finances, health, relationships and future potential.  Then look at the cost of them NOT having the result: how will NOT solving the problem cost them, in the areas of finances, health, relationships and future potential?

Don’t skip this step!  It’s this uncovering of the true value of the results to the client that ultimately determines what you can (and should) charge.

Step 7. Decide your price.

This is simple math.  To get your fee, take your desired number and divide it by the number of clients you must enroll into your new package.  If the number makes you gasp (!), do NOT lower your fee!  Instead, focus on creating value.  Ask yourself:

“What kind of value do I have to provide in this program in order to charge that amount?”

Who You’re BEING Determines How Much You’re Charging

Your fee reflects your confidence in your skill set. If you’re feeling a lack of confidence in yours, ask yourself: is that doubt really about your skills, or are you taking on the responsibility for your clients?  (“I don’t want to promise results…”)

Remember that your modality – be it coaching, massage, acupuncture, Reiki – has a lineage of transformation behind it, one you can draw on to boost your confidence when you doubt that your stuff really works.  Remember, you’re not the first person to create success doing what you do!

When you are BEING the Divine Feminine Leader you truly are (instead of doubting or taking on their stuff), your clients will feel it, giving them the confidence they need to get the transformation they truly want – at the rates you desire and deserve.

How To Free Up 2 Hours Of Time Each Day (In One Step)

Would you like to know the secret to freeing up literally two hours of your time, each and every day?

If you’re like 99% of the entrepreneurs out there, you can magically create up to 2 hours of time every work day with a single step.

Are you ready for the magic?  Here it is…

Let GO of email.

That’s it.  That’s the secret.

Far too many women entrepreneurs give up their power, their time and their life by being at the beck and call of email.  How do I know?  Because I hear it all the time from my clients, and… I used to be one of them.

Trust me, Goddess, it’s no coincidence that I made my first 6-figures in the same 6-month period that I finally just said NO to the email insanity.  If you want to step into being the Divine Feminine Leader of your business (and make your next big leap in income and impact), you must get a handle on your email.  Here are my 3 favorite tips for taming the email beastie:

1. Stop giving it away.

Be honest, now – how many times have you spent 45 minutes answering a client question that should have been brought to the next session?  How about agonizing to get just the right words (read: so you don’t hurt their feelings) in a response to someone else’s emergency or drama?  Or when a client asks you to “just have a quick peek at my website” and 2 hours later…

When you give away your time to answering client email – you’re doing exactly that: giving away your time.  And you know that once you open that door… your clients are going to ask for more and more.  The answer is to set a clear boundary: stop giving away email access, except for your highest level clients.

Taking this ONE action step will literally change your life.  Here’s some wording you can model, taken from the invitation to one of my programs:

Priority Email Access For Quick Questions And Feedback

As a Divine Feminine Leader member, you get Elizabeth’s “super secret” email address for burning questions and quick feedback.  (Responses within 48 hours, Monday through Thursday.)

Notice how this positioning of my email sets an expectation and a clear boundary, one that I can return to again if issues arise (they rarely do).

2. Create a “super secret” email address – and keep it secret.

Your super-secret email your next clear boundary.  By “super secret,” I mean, ONLY for your family, close friends, team and Platinum clients.  Nobody else.

You can decide if you want to receive newsletters at your super-secret address.  If you do, limit it to the top 5 that you read, and filter them into a folder so you can read them once a week or 5 minutes a day.  Decide what works for you and stick to it.  (And no Facebook notifications!)

Whenever I give my super-secret email to my clients, friends or partners, I am very clear about the rules.  When someone violates them, they’re out.  Yes, I’m ruthless about this.  You should be too!

3. Release control.

All of the mail that comes to your “public email” – whatever you use on your newsletters, website, etc –  should be sorted, handled and answered by an assistant.

(Stay with me!  Keep breathing!)

Giving up email can feel complicated, but it’s really pretty simple.  (Hint: this is a great place for your mind to create confusion and make it seem more overwhelming than it really is.)  When you break it down, your business email will fall into these categories:

• Potential clients
• Current clients
• Potential partners (invites for telesummits, speaking gigs, etc)
• Personal
• Testimonials / raving fans
• Newsletters
• Emails from programs you participate in as a client

Start by creating a simple checklist of what you want your assistant to do for each of these categories. Yes, you’ll oversee your assistant at first, but very quickly they will learn how to respond on your behalf, leaving you free to put your focus where it belongs: income-producing activities.

4. Set a time… and a timer

Respond to email at certain times each day – for example, mid-morning and late afternoon (but definitely not first thing when you wake up!).  Set a timer for how long you’ll answer.  This takes a bit of discipline at first, but stick with it and you’ll be amazed at how quickly you’ll begin to “keep to time…” and how much time you’ll have left over for the things that really matter.

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