The wealth creation secret of the 21st century

You’ve probably heard that one of the “main ingredients” in creating a joyful, abundant business and lifestyle is your ability to receive.

Now, if you’re anything like I was not so long ago, when the mentors and self-help peeps start in on the receiving thing, perhaps your instinct is to say something like, “Yeah, that’s great.  While I’m waiting for the receiving faery to drop by, I’ll be over here… you know, working.”

Like most women, I had my natural, Divine Feminine ability to receive beaten out of me at a young age.  It took me a while to really get the importance of receiving, and even longer to actually change my behavior around it.

One of my favorite multi-millionaire mentors, Eben Pagan, has a beautiful way of looking at receiving.  According to Eben, receiving is the wealth creation secret of the 21^st century.”

As women on the path of spiritual entrepreneurship, we must reclaim our natural ability to receive.  For 99.999% of us, that means we have to practice.  So where do you start?

• Being willing to receive support from friends, family, significant others, and people who are there to serve you. One of my mentors tells the story of her personal turning point: when a kid offered to carry her groceries and she decided to let him.

• Being willing to receive support from top notch team members.

• Being willing to graciously receive a compliment. If you have a hard time with this at first, remember that reflecting or dismissing compliments actually disrespects the giver.  (This shouldn’t be your only motivation for accepting them, of course, but use it as a place to start if receiving compliments is difficult for you!)

• Being willing to receive coaching from experienced mentors.

• Being willing to receive higher fees from better clients. The money you receive in your business represents your client’s commitment to you, to what you do, and their own transformation.

• Being willing to receive a beautiful environment. Recently I made the decision that I would always have fresh roses and candles in my office.  How can you uplevel your surroundings?

Note that many of these receivings do involve releasing money into the world – otherwise known as investing in yourself.  Clinging tightly to money, micro-managing money and telling yourself “I can’t afford it” constantly is another expression of the withholding pattern.

Instead, decide what you CAN do, starting wherever you are.  But start.  (Those fresh roses in my office?  I get ‘em at my local supermarket, $10 for a dozen.  And they last at least a week – hello, how cool is that?!)

My coach’s request to you this week is to consciously practice receiving at least 3 times over the next 7 days.  Make sure at least one of those practices involves receiving some of your own energy back in the form of money.  You are worth it!

Bright blessings and massive success to you…

Are you doing what’s convenient, or whatever it takes?

“If you’re interested, you’ll do what’s convenient. If you’re committed, you’ll do whatever it takes.” – John Assaraf

One of my spirit rich marketing coach colleagues, Suzanne Evans, reminded me of this quote when she said it from the stage at her 1-day event in San Diego a couple of weekends ago. Many have heard it. (Maybe you have, too.) In my experience, few peeps really understand what it means.

Here is what it means for me…

• It’s not convenient to invest $20,000+ in my business for coaching, training, and seminars each and every year. (I’ve well surpassed that mark this year and already have my eye on a few options for next year.)

• It’s not always convenient to find and invest in quality team members who keep my business running smoothly (and keep me from going insane *grin*).

• It’s never convenient to get on a plane and be away from my beloved hubby Leland to regularly attend seminars and retreats. (Confession: I hate air travel because even when you go first class, it’s a hassle.)

• I know this is going to seem like a total shock, but it’s not always convenient to write this newsletter on a weekly basis, even though I truly love it! (Yes, I skipped a week last week – it happens!)

• It wasn’t convenient (and certainly not comfortable) to get over my fear of being pushy and what others might think in order to master the critical skill of authentic enrollment conversations…

• It’s not convenient to sink tons of time, energy and money into mentors, programs, vendors, or contractors that don’t work out only to have to start over again from scratch (read: invest more, sometimes not knowing where the money is going to come from)

• It’s not convenient to choose to move forward in the face of uncertainty, and in some cases paralyzing fear. (Of course this still happens to me!)

None of these things are particularly convenient. (And I left a lot of inconvenient things off the list.)

All of them are required to honor the commitment I’ve made to myself, my business, my calling, and those I am meant to transform in the world.

One of the things I highly value is running my business and life from a place of the Divine Feminine. “Doing what it takes” can sound suspiciously like the pushing and striving masculine energy paradigm that doesn’t resonate with many women entrepreneurs. Here’s what I’ve discovered…

“Doing what it takes” doesn’t necessarily mean doing more, or exhausting yourself. (Don’t get me wrong – there are times when you need to roll up your sleeves and “git ‘er done,” as one of my old mentors likes to say.)

“Doing what it takes” usually means stepping through fear with grace… so you can do things differently. Indeed, in the end, doing what it takes usually means freeing up your energy, and concentrating ONLY on the things that you love, instead of being stuck in endless busy-work or doing everything yourself.

So if you’re not satisfied with your clients and in-come right now, my question to you is this: are you doing what’s convenient, or are you doing what it takes? What are you resisting?

Bright blessings and massive success to you…

Are you guilty of “too much bootstrapping” syndrome?

One of the biggest traps that entrepreneurs fall into is trying to do everything on their own.

When you’re starting out, I believe that “flying solo” for a little while actually makes sense.  So does sampling a lot of low cost trainings with different mentors.  Why?  Because when you’re just starting out, blundering around is part of the deal. You’re going to be trying different things, bumping your head a little, and course-correcting.  It’s all part of finding your footing, so to speak.

But there comes a point – and it’s sooner than you think – that NOT getting expert help will cost you, big time.  While it may seem noble to try to figure everything out yourself, all that time spent learning something that an experienced mentor can tell you in about 5 minutes is time that you could have spent either marketing (attracting new clients) or serving (working with clients).

When I was first starting out, I was convinced that I didn’t have the money for a mentor.  Frankly, I was afraid.  So I joined the best low-cost program I could find, and – pardon the expression – worked the hell out of it.  I’m talking about listening to audio after audio… piecing together the “how” from endless 90-minute training calls… and, well, slogging.

Now, if I could turn back the clock, I would have found a way to step up.  Not just because of all the time and opportunities that I lost (and there were many), but because choosing the long and slow road was disempowering.  It sent the message to the Universe that I didn’t feel like I was deserving of support, and that I didn’t really believe in my powers of creation and manifestation.  Yuck.

So how do you know when it’s time to stop bootstrapping and get a mentor?  Here are a few questions to ask:

Have I been working really hard at the same level for 6 months or more, and am not making the progress I want?

Would I hire a mentor in a heartbeat “if I only had the money”?

Do I know in my heart that it’s time, but… [insert story here]

Those who are successful in any endeavor – be it solo business, a career, arts, medicine, anything – NEVER get there alone.  Allowing yourself to receive support sends a powerful message to the Universe: that you value yourself, are committed to the people you serve, and that you are ready to receive the success that you seek.

Bright blessings and massive success to you…

How to gracefully stop “giving away the farm”

Earlier this week, I had the privilege of facilitating an amazing all-day virtual workshop for my “MMM goddesses” on the topic of money breakthroughs and manifestation.

One of my clients asked a question that has been “up” for many in the group lately. “How do I know when I am over-giving? And how do I stop over-giving?”

Over-giving is a classic symptom of the Money Mirror of Deservability. Deservability also shows up as cramming too much “stuff” in your packages and programs, giving away extra services (more than what’s paid for) without charging, or making yourself too available (think after-hours or weekend phone calls from demanding clients).

The recurring theme behind the Money Mirror of Deservability is “never enough” and the emotional undercurrent is a driving need to please. No matter how much you give away your time, services, or expertise, somehow it’s never enough. And because what you really want is acknowledgement and acceptance, you’ll bend over backwards to get it. Problem is, it’s never enough – creating a vicious cycle of burnout, exhaustion and resentment.

(One of the big ironies of this Money Mirror is that deservability attracts more deservability – in other words, you’ll tend to attract clients who take a “not good enough” stance when it comes to your services. Aie yi yi!)

The best way to know if you’re over-giving is to simply check in. Are you working really hard? Is the true energy behind giving more a genuine desire to create value (which you can do without working yourself into a frenzy, by the way) or a fear that what you do give “isn’t enough” or a need to please?

Most importantly, check your level of satisfaction. Are you at peace? If not, it’s time to stop giving away the farm at such a great cost to you.

Try this breakthrough action to stop over-giving: The next time you’re designing a program or service, cut the deliverables in half. For each component of your program, ask, “Do they really need this to get the outcome?”

This might seem like a drastic measure, but actually, your clients will feel relieved. Remember, you can always add things back in, but even just cutting them out “on paper” will shift your thinking.

When you look to other people, such as your own clients, to know that you’re “good enough,” you’ll never be satisfied. It is up to YOU to give yourself the gifts of acceptance, acknowledgement and love. You are perfect, right now, as you are.

Bright blessings and massive success to you….

Guess what? It’s okay to be frustrated!

Talk to any experienced coach and they’ll tell you: with big changes come the phenomenon known as “hitting a wall” or “running up against your stuff.”   It goes something like this…

You make a decision to get more clients, increase your fees, grow your list, create a six-figure business, design the life you love.  At first, you’re zipping along.  You have some amazing wins, you’re finally starting to feel like you have some momentum… and bam, out comes the “stuff” that has tripped you up in the past.

Guess what!  It’s totally OKAY to be frustrated with this annoying pattern because… it’s freakin’ annoying!  And sometimes worse.

It’s okay to be frustrated. No matter what the so-called gurus say, building a six-figure solo business is neither quick nor easy.  It takes sustained focus, constant problem-solving and consistent action to make it happen.  None of that is easy in the face of all of the internal emotional shenanigans that come up in the process.

It’s okay to be frustrated.  But here’s the thing: like everything else in our lives, wallowing in the frustration is a choice.

Personally, I’m okay with being frustrated.  I have come to really accept that frustration is part of this process.  I am NOT okay with keeping myself stuck in the frustration.  It takes me out of the game, disconnects me from Spirit (my gal Lady Universe), keeps me from helping others, and feels like crap.

(Oh yeah, and it’s also ridiculously financially costly.  Whatever you’re tolerating can be measured in lost dollars and cents in your business – I guarantee it.)

Each and every one of us is responsible for our own experience. In my programs, I challenge my clients to show up and get the outcome they invested in.  My coach’s request to you this week is the following exercise.

Take a look at whatever is frustrating you right now.   Acknowledge that it’s OKAY to be frustrated.  Acknowledge that your frustration is an opportunity for a breakthrough to real, lasting change.

Ask  yourself, “What do I want instead?”

Then ask yourself, “What do I need to let go of in order to have what I want?”

Then ask, “What bold action do I want to take right now?”

Remember, what you want is on the OTHER side of whatever frustration you feel right now.  I invite you to move through it quickly.  Bright blessings and massive success to you…

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