Earlier this week, I had the privilege of facilitating an amazing all-day virtual workshop for my “MMM goddesses” on the topic of money breakthroughs and manifestation.
One of my clients asked a question that has been “up” for many in the group lately. “How do I know when I am over-giving? And how do I stop over-giving?”
Over-giving is a classic symptom of the Money Mirror of Deservability. Deservability also shows up as cramming too much “stuff” in your packages and programs, giving away extra services (more than what’s paid for) without charging, or making yourself too available (think after-hours or weekend phone calls from demanding clients).
The recurring theme behind the Money Mirror of Deservability is “never enough” and the emotional undercurrent is a driving need to please. No matter how much you give away your time, services, or expertise, somehow it’s never enough. And because what you really want is acknowledgement and acceptance, you’ll bend over backwards to get it. Problem is, it’s never enough – creating a vicious cycle of burnout, exhaustion and resentment.
(One of the big ironies of this Money Mirror is that deservability attracts more deservability – in other words, you’ll tend to attract clients who take a “not good enough” stance when it comes to your services. Aie yi yi!)
The best way to know if you’re over-giving is to simply check in. Are you working really hard? Is the true energy behind giving more a genuine desire to create value (which you can do without working yourself into a frenzy, by the way) or a fear that what you do give “isn’t enough” or a need to please?
Most importantly, check your level of satisfaction. Are you at peace? If not, it’s time to stop giving away the farm at such a great cost to you.
Try this breakthrough action to stop over-giving: The next time you’re designing a program or service, cut the deliverables in half. For each component of your program, ask, “Do they really need this to get the outcome?”
This might seem like a drastic measure, but actually, your clients will feel relieved. Remember, you can always add things back in, but even just cutting them out “on paper” will shift your thinking.
When you look to other people, such as your own clients, to know that you’re “good enough,” you’ll never be satisfied. It is up to YOU to give yourself the gifts of acceptance, acknowledgement and love. You are perfect, right now, as you are.
Bright blessings and massive success to you….
YeeHa! I’m very excited to bring a special call with one of my most impactful mentors, David Neagle, to the Marketing Goddess community:
THURSDAY, AUGUST 12 at 7pm ET / 4pm PT
Here is just some of what David will teach in this content-rich call:
- The creative process for manifesting any want/need/goal
- How to set the target: Making goals that are worthy of you, and that will move your forward in massive leaps.
- Quantum leap goal achievement: Understanding the Universal laws that govern RAPID goal manifestation
- The 2 elements of any goal that are critical for its manifestation
- Overcoming obstacles, challenge, indecision, and lack of confidence along the pathway of goal manifestation
I met David at his Experience The Reality Of Success seminar in March of 2009. What impressed me most about David was his ability to hold people in their power and take a strong stand for their highest good. (I have yet to meet any coach who models “compassionate detatchment” like David!)
For call in details, go here and click on “Listen-In” on the left-hand side.
Bright blessings and massive success to you!
“Got out of my comfort zone and enrolled a new program – at a higher fee than I ever could have imagined!”
Before working with Elizabeth, I had begun to settle into – and settle for – the idea that I was “just another Tarot reader”. I lost sight of my uniqueness and lost interest in my work, tired of doing the same old things in the same old way. My clients were reflecting that back to me, too.
Elizabeth invited me to step into a different way of working with my clients and challenged me to stretch beyond my comfort zone of “the old way.” With her help, I’ve created a one-day intensive and got my first client for the program – at a fee higher than I ever could have imagined! I’ll admit I was wondering if my clients would really go for it, and I was pleasantly surprised at just how easy it was to enroll.
I love how the new format allows clients to realize benefits that could have taken many months to achieve using traditional, one-at-a-time tarot readings and coaching sessions. This program is the beginning of my new signature system, and I’m excited to be creating a system for my clients that helps them get great results.
Now, new clients are coming to me and I know I can provide what they want and need. I’m excited about working with clients who are ready to explore a deeper and more empowering Tarot experience. I know that this new program is just the beginning of taking my business to the next level, both in terms of income and the kinds of clients I attract. I love how I’m growing right along with my clients when I consciously grow my business!
Talk to any experienced coach and they’ll tell you: with big changes come the phenomenon known as “hitting a wall” or “running up against your stuff.” It goes something like this…
You make a decision to get more clients, increase your fees, grow your list, create a six-figure business, design the life you love. At first, you’re zipping along. You have some amazing wins, you’re finally starting to feel like you have some momentum… and bam, out comes the “stuff” that has tripped you up in the past.
Guess what! It’s totally OKAY to be frustrated with this annoying pattern because… it’s freakin’ annoying! And sometimes worse.
It’s okay to be frustrated. No matter what the so-called gurus say, building a six-figure solo business is neither quick nor easy. It takes sustained focus, constant problem-solving and consistent action to make it happen. None of that is easy in the face of all of the internal emotional shenanigans that come up in the process.
It’s okay to be frustrated. But here’s the thing: like everything else in our lives, wallowing in the frustration is a choice.
Personally, I’m okay with being frustrated. I have come to really accept that frustration is part of this process. I am NOT okay with keeping myself stuck in the frustration. It takes me out of the game, disconnects me from Spirit (my gal Lady Universe), keeps me from helping others, and feels like crap.
(Oh yeah, and it’s also ridiculously financially costly. Whatever you’re tolerating can be measured in lost dollars and cents in your business – I guarantee it.)
Each and every one of us is responsible for our own experience. In my programs, I challenge my clients to show up and get the outcome they invested in. My coach’s request to you this week is the following exercise.
Take a look at whatever is frustrating you right now. Acknowledge that it’s OKAY to be frustrated. Acknowledge that your frustration is an opportunity for a breakthrough to real, lasting change.
Ask yourself, “What do I want instead?”
Then ask yourself, “What do I need to let go of in order to have what I want?”
Then ask, “What bold action do I want to take right now?”
Remember, what you want is on the OTHER side of whatever frustration you feel right now. I invite you to move through it quickly. Bright blessings and massive success to you…
As spiritual entrepreneurs, it’s pretty much a given that we hate being sales-y, hard selling, used car salesmen and any kind of high-pressure selling situations. And yet, we have to sell our services and make money if we want to make an impact. What to do?
If you’ve ever struggled with that dilemma, let me introduce you to the most effective, authentic, non-pushy, unpaid sales force you could ever wish for: your clients.
What your clients say about you to others will always be more impactful with new peeps than anything you could say on your own. Why? Because they are proof positive of what you do! (Others reinforcing your claims through things like testimonials are known as social proof, a proven element of ethical persuasion.)
While you’ll still need to get on the phone with a potential client and “seal the deal” with a value-rich conversation, taking these 3 steps consistently will result in more potential clients who are already pre-sold on working with you.
1. Help ‘em get great results. We all want to help clients get great results because it’s what we truly want for them. It’s also just good business. When your clients get great results, chances are they’ll come back for more. They’ll also sing your praises from the rooftops, talk about you to their friends and send peeps your way. (Otherwise known as “I have a possible client for you…”)
Helping your clients get results doesn’t have to mean a lot of extra work for you – remember, you are not doing the work. One strategy: create a signature system that, when followed, inevitably leads them to what they want.
2. Collect testimonials religiously and share them with everyone. When your clients get great results, they will be happy to share the love in the form of a compelling success story… but it’s up to YOU to get them. And that means being prepared for every opportunity and making collecting them a habit.
The first step is to get into the habit of asking. When a client sends you an email raving about you, simply ask, “I’d love to feature you in my marketing because I know my peeps will find your story inspiring. Would you be willing to share your story?” Offer to draft a case study. Provide them with questions to give you some raw material that you can shape into a “before and after” testimonial for their approval.
Remember, your clients WANT to help you! But don’t make them figure it out or work hard for you. Be at the ready with systems to turn their kudos into compelling case studies that attract more clients just like them. Then post them everywhere: on your website, blog, in your ezine, etc.
3. Appreciate ‘em. Your clients long for acknowledgement and love to be appreciated. Show your clients that you care with things like thank-you cards, special savings on your classes and programs, and client appreciation events (like a special teleseminar).
What’s the best way to show your clients that you appreciate their referrals? A thank-you in the form of… money! And you don’t need a formal affiliate program to keep track of things. Simply ask your new clients, “Who may I thank for your referral?” And do it – with a check.
You don’t need to “convince” a potential client who is ready to say yes! By nurturing your current clients via these 3 tips, they’ll feel great about referring you to their friends. Which means you’ll naturally start to experience more people coming to you who already know how you can help them – no convincing required.