Don’t blame the guru

Lately I’ve noticed an abundance of what I’ll call “guru backlash”: a glut of negativity directed towards very visible mentors in the marketing coaching space – on Twitter, Facebook, blogs, and forums.

The comments run the gamut from simple frustration to potshots to name-calling to total slamming. I’ve also seen marketers and coaches I like and truly respect using this conversation to help them sell their latest product or offering.

Obviously, there is nothing wrong with stating an opinion or sharing your experience. One of the things I love most about social media is the open dialogue. And criticism, both constructive and not, comes with the territory when you become a leader, especially one who is making a lot of money.

But here’s the deal…

There’s this little thing called personal responsibility. As in, each and every one of us is responsible for our own results. Many of those participating in the guru backlash conversation seem to have forgotten this, if they even knew it in the first place.

Here’s the deal. The guru you invested in is not responsible when you the results you want don’t materialize. You are. Yep, even when you’re sitting there going, “I’ve done all that and it’s still not working.”

I know that’s tough to swallow. Please stick with me, because personal responsibility is a really important concept, perhaps the most important one of all.

I am not immune to forgetting about personal responsibility, by the way. At one point at my recent mastermind, I found myself bellyaching about some big name marketer in my Twitter feed and how they “annoyed” me. (“Annoyed” is my catch-all term for various disgruntlements, from envy to mild sorrow to rage to, well, annoyance.)

“So why are they in your Twitter feed?” my coach asked.

“Oh yeah,” I said.

As business owners, we’re all going to make poor choices from time to time. It happens. Some of these involve money. When it happens to you, blaming the guru isn’t going to change the fact that it was your choice. The buck (such as it is) begins and ends with you.

When I lay my mo-ney down for a service or a program, it’s my choice, my free will, my money, my energy. Sure, sometimes I wish I’d made a different choice. But I didn’t. It was my choice.

The really great news? Accepting responsibility for your outcomes is the key to freedom. Because when you accept responsibility, your power stays with you.

Let’s say that for whatever reason, a particular choice didn’t work out. So you make a new choice. A new decision. You move on. (And take the mentor out of your Twitter feed.) And your personal power builds.

My coach’s request to you is to watch for where you’re blaming the guru (or anyone else) for your less-than-desirable outcomes, and where you’re not taking credit for the amazing results that YOU created. (This personal responsibility thing goes both ways – no more dismissing your accomplishments.)

When you catch yourself, simply acknowledge that by saying, My freedom lies in accepting responsibility for this outcome I have created. Course-correct, as appropriate. And in either case, celebrate yourself for your awareness, and your deliberate creation of your life. Bright blessings and massive success to you…