Lesson From ERS: How Are You Showing Up In Your Business And Your Life?

Straight up: Vegas isn’t my scene. Given my druthers, were I planning a trip for myself and my husband Leland, there are a zillion places I’d pick first.  Give me my British Isles, my Pagan sacred sites, the Goddess-inspired spiritual pilgrimage I’ve been planning off and on for years… to say nothing of all the cool places in the US of A I’ve never been… (And all of Leland’s favorite haunts I’ve not yet seen – you get the picture!)

Thing is, when you’re doing the seminar thing, you go where the seminar is. David Neagle’s Experience The Reality Of Success (which I attended last week) was in Vegas – specifically, Caesar’s Palace.  As with all marketing & learning I do, I set some very clear intentions, including:

“Gosh darn it all, if I’m going to be in Caesar’s Palace, I’m going to enjoy the luxury!” (And I have to tell you, I was actually looking forward to it – I had my bath goodies all packed and everything.)

When I arrived at the check-in desk and the check-in dude asked me if I’d like a room upgrade, my intuition said YES!  My mouth, however, said, “Oh that’s okay, I’m sure the room’s fine, never mind.”

Except that it wasn’t. The room was kind of… boring.  It looked like every other hotel room I’ve ever been in.  The view was a concrete wall.  The room was dark.  The bathtub was small.  And it was a freakin’ hike to get there.

Okay, so it’s not what you expected, but hey, it’s Vegas. You don’t even LIKE Vegas…!  Whatever, it’s fine, it’s cool, no problem.

Except that it wasn’t.  And it really, really bothered me.

Two days in, another coach and her partner invited me to their room for some socializing.  Their room was amazing.  1,100 square feet, gorgeous everything, a full kitchen, a sparkling bathroom with a shower AND a whirlpool bath, a walk-in closet, and a penthouse view to die for.

“Wow,” I said.  “How’d you end up with this?”

She shrugged.  “We asked for an upgrade.  I can’t remember how much it cost, but it wasn’t much.”  Settling hadn’t even occurred to her.

Food for thought.  (Specifically, my next thought was: “This is ridiculous.”)

The next morning, I asked for an upgrade and within a few hours, I was enjoying a room twice the size of my original, with my own sparkling bathroom, whirlpool bath, and gorgeous view:

While it wasn’t 1,100 square feet, it was perfect for me. Upgrade cost: $40 per night.

The lesson is a subtle one:

How you show up anywhere is how you show up EVERYWHERE.

When I walked into the first hotel room, I knew immediately that it wasn’t going to work for me. Heck, I knew that as soon as the check-in guy said “upgrade” and I ignored my intuition. And then I ignored my disappointment, pretended it didn’t exist, just tried to “make do.”

“Upgrading” the situation to something I really wanted didn’t cost me much in terms of dollars.  Falling into my old pattern of “it doesn’t really matter” cost me dearly, as my mind gently reminded me of how much I was settling each and every time I walked into my room.

This would be all fine and good if we were just talking about a hotel room.  But the truth is, some 90% of our behavior is subconscious.  That means we’re walking around on autopilot.  How you show up anywhere is how you show up everywhere. With your family, your business, everywhere.  (“How are you showing up?” is one of the themes of ERS – it’s something David returns to again and again throughout the weekend.  The hotel room thing clearly wasn’t a coincidence! )

How often do you tell yourself “it doesn’t really matter” when it really does?  When you tell yourself the little things don’t matter, what are you really telling yourself, those you love, and those you’re meant to help?

Pay attention to where you’re short-changing yourself, holding back, and dismissing what you really want.  Because if you’re ignoring your needs and wants in one area of your life, you’re certainly ignoring them in your business, too.

(And if it makes you happy, more productive, and harms none, why should you settle for anything less than what you really, really want?)